The Dance of Unworthiness

Sabine Jakobs Coach, Worthy, Motivational Talks, Emotional Resilience

Some of us have blindly accepted the dance of unworthiness….moving your grooves can help.

What the heck are grooves?

This is my non-medical, non-technical explanation.

Our grooves are the negative patterns, the self-doubt driver, the neurological pathways in our mind that create an auto response to external stimuli.

They were established when we were young based upon our perception of our surroundings. We absorbed the values and beliefs that our primary caregivers projected onto us – we didn’t question the repetitive messages. We immersed into them. We attempted to process all the mixed messages, responding from an internal place of safety to our current circumstances or perceived threats.

When there is pain from shame, fear, abuse, grief, inconsistent love, and so forth, we separate parts of ourselves to avoid future pain. We experiment with different behaviors, storing the responses. It’s basic survival skills without cognitive understanding.

The more this occurs, the more our brain creates pathways to process perceived threats faster, to avoid pain, to simply react, remaining impervious to future consequences.

Once we age to adulthood, those pathways, now on auto-response to stimuli, real or imagined, are what I call the grooves. They appear to keep us safe and protected.

They drive our response in the present moment.

To move our grooves, we need to look at our belief system, be aware of our auto-response, and be willing to discover who we are, verses who we were taught to be.

We can thrive, instead of just surviving.

We can choose a path of self-awareness.

We can take back our power and heal all our separated parts in the messiness of love and acceptance. We can untether from the past story and create a new ending.

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